Bullying, Part Two: Local Family Feels Impact of Bullying

This is part two of a six-part series on bullying. Read part one, which looked at the author's experiences with bullying. 

I spoke with the mother of a child who has recently been verbally and physically bullied at school, here in St. Charles County.

We'll call them "Mama" and "Kiddo," to keep their identities anonymous. Mama's report is:

"My son was physically attacked at school. He is fifteen years old and a freshman. The bully who attacked my son is someone who he has had many issues with in the past, but nothing like this.

The day before both my son and this other student were given two days of in school suspension for a shoving match, and both had assured the principal that it was over. (The following day) Kiddo was then punched in the left temple, and then the right side of his face.

He fell into a vending machine, then to the floor, receiving a concussion and a very badly bruised and swollen face.The school called me and informed me of what had happened and upon my request the other boy was arrested."

Mama continued to tell me that Kiddo had gone to the office on multiple occasions—nearly every week—throughout the school year, due to this child and others bullying him. The principals and/or counselors advised him to "get a thick skin and ignore them."

She also stated that "he was told that they didn't have time to write it up, but to leave a note for them about what had happened. (The day of the last attack) the principal had told my husband when he got to the school to make sure Kiddo was okay, and that they had not been told at all about the bullying, which is a lie, as I have called them MANY times because of Kiddo telling me they won't do anything about it."

Mama has since then not allowed Kiddo to go back to school, as he feels completely unsafe being around these bullies. The school's crisis counselor has had Mama assign Kiddo a child psychiatrist to fill out specific paperwork to allow a teacher to coach him at home a couple hours per day.

Kiddo has fallen so far behind in his classwork that he is currently failing all of his classes, but still refuses to go to school, in spite of visits from the principal and junior crisis counselor, who stopped by a few times to try and convince Kiddo he is fine and he needs to come back to class.

Mama also says that, in spite of the reports of Kiddo going to the office and her own phone calls, "the school still takes no responsibility. They did however admit they have a bully issue and don't know what to do about it."

This story has yet to reach a conclusion, but is extremely discouraging that an anti-bullying policy is either not in place or is not being properly executed.

Signs A Child is Being Bullied

According to Stopbullying.gov, there are many warning signs that show someone is being bullied or is bullying others. But kids may not exhibit all of these symptoms, or it could indicate other issues. 

• Comes home with damaged or missing clothing/belongings
• Reports losing items such as books, electronics, clothing, or jewelry
• Has unexplained injuries
• Complains frequently of headaches, stomachaches, or feeling sick
• Has trouble sleeping or has frequent bad dreams
• Has changes in eating habits
• Hurts themselves
• Are very hungry after school from not eating lunch
• Runs away from home
• Loses interest in visiting or talking with friends
• Is afraid of going to school or other activities with peers
• Loses interest in school work or begins to do poorly in school
• Appears sad, moody, angry, anxious or depressed when they come home
• Talks about suicide
• Feels helpless
• Often feels like they are not good enough
• Blames themselves for their problems
• Suddenly has fewer friends
• Avoids certain places
• Acts differently than usual

Part three of this series looks at two children that have committed "bully-cide," or committed suicide after being bullied, and the impact bullying has on children, individually, in groups, and the bullies themselves.